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Learning to Let Go {again}

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.”
~Steve Maraboli

In my knowing, letting go is essential for growth. There are times when letting go of friends, behaviors, coping mechanisms and emotional crutches have left me paralyzed with fear within my inner interior. Other times, they were let go for me, and I felt compete inner freedom.  Someone once told me the only way to make room for the new is to let go of the past. Let us face it, it is easier said than done.

I cannot help but have some trouble with letting go and today I realized why. The purpose of this post is to decrease the degree of separation one might feel if they are experiencing something similar, it is not an attempt to teach you how to let go. It is never my intention to make it seem that I have the answers or that I am perfect because I am certainly not, my humanness is very much alive.

Inner Freedom - The Inner Interior

Yesterday I had to make a decision as to whether I was going to stay emotionally connected to someone I have known for a very long time. After sitting with my emotions in silence, I decided to let go of this relationship and its hopes for ever being what I thought it could be. The difference between letting go myself is the backlash my mind gives me. I found myself making every attempt to prove that my letting go was going to benefit me and that it was the “right” decision. I felt guilt and deep sorrow in my heart. After my emotional rollercoaster came to a gentle halt I realized a few things that may help you in the future if you find yourself in a similar place.

* If someone is holding me back, let them go and continue moving forward no matter what.

* Nothing is ever at it seems.

* By letting go of those things that do not serve me, I create space in my heart for someone who truly deserves that sacred space.

* Superficial relationships result in superficial thoughts and actions.

* Connecting with those who share the love for the journey of life are the ones I enjoy being around the most.

* Sometimes it takes a radical approach to letting someone go, and while that may cause some inner sorrow, a release will come when I surrender my feelings.

* I never have to remove my love for another person, all I have to do is remove myself from the relationship.

* I never have to apologize for making a decision that best serves my highest good.

* Trusting my inner voice to lead me will always result in the inner “click.”

* I am not perfect, therefore I do not make perfect decisions, and that is OK.

* Certain experiences occur so that I become aware letting go is just the next single thing I must do.

* Sometimes, just by relaxing into the feelings, what I need removed is and dissolved without me ever needing to do anything myself.

This post seems almost incredibly simple as I am writing it, but it hasn’t been my experience as of late. There is a grieving period whenever we find ourselves in a place where parts of our lives have been released. For me, I feel as though I have lost a little part of me and in a way, I have. The old relationships must die in order for new ones to be born. The key is to not beat ourselves up for making decisions based on what we feel is right for our future.

Have you ever had to leave a relationship and found it tricky? What is your practice when it comes to making decisions based on what it best for the higher good?

Please know that you are not alone if you find yourself here. My one and only hope for this blog is that it serves as a refuge and a place where you know we are always holding hands.

Thank you for being here.

Jocelyn

  • May 20, 2015 - 12:58 am

    tina @ Colourliving - I have lost count on how many relationships I’ve ended. Some have ended their relationships with me so I’ve had it from both sides.

    All I can share is that the first time is the worst and it gets better from then on. It also usually always hurts and there’s a grieving period. HOWEVER, I have yet to regret any ending of any relationship in my life which tells me that it was the right decision. And yes, unfortunately we all have to close doors in order for new ones to open.ReplyCancel

    • May 20, 2015 - 6:14 pm

      Jocelyn - That is exactly right, we can move forward yet still respect everyone for who they are 🙂ReplyCancel

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